Who are we?
We are a collection of individuals who are able to feel the energy of others in a deep way. Often it is so hard for us to attend events with lots of people. Some say this is due to social anxiety and being an empath can predispose to social anxiety of course. However where does that anxiety originate? Should we even ask that question? I believe we should, though definitely not in the sense of this as being wrong.
We are all energy beings. The heartmath institute have done a mountain of research on how far our energy field extends and the impact of this. Some of us have experienced strong connections with people hundreds of miles away.
How Our Energy Affects Others
Why are we highly empathic / super sensitive?
There may a number of reasons for this and those will likely be different for everyone. Dr Judith Orloff has identified 4 reasons:
- Temperament or Natural traits of being a highly sensitive. Some babies are naturally more sensitive both in the womb and from immediately following birth.
- Genetics – some highly sensitive children are born of at least one parent who is also highly sensitive. Whilst we have no defined genes for these traits there may be a genetic inheritance picture according to Dr Orloff
- Trauma, childhood neglect or abuse. Orloff has observed children of alcoholic, narcissistic or emotional unavailable parents may potentially have a reduced the level of coping strategies. These children feel unseen in their families and invisible to the outside world. Their sense of self becomes eroded as a result. They have often never had the experience of learning to self-soothe.
- Unsupportive parenting Orloff defines as angry, stressed, too busy, noisy or chaotic households. These also have a negative effect on empaths and Highly sensitives.
- I would like to add another consideration. I see a lot of people with connection survival style adaptation from trauma that occurs either in the womb or within 6 months of birth. Lawrence Heller has identified and explained this extremely well. For those who experienced intra-uterine trauma (between conception and birth). This could be due to a massive increase in cortisol and adrenaline across the placenta from a mother who is really anxious (maybe due to the death of a loved one, previous still birth, previous multiple miscarriages, unexpected / unwanted pregnancy, relationship difficulties etc). For those who experienced trauma during or around the birth, this can be due to an emergency Cesarian section birth, cord around the neck, premature birth requiring special care, forceps delivery, birth defects. For those experiencing trauma after the birth and before 6 months of age we could consider the stress of being poor, being in the wrong relationship or not having support, physically or mentally unwell parent/s, dogma (leaving a child to cry encourages the child to learn to self soothe). I would also suggest intergenerational trauma affects a child really badly at this age.
Klinghardt suggested children with an autism spectrum diagnosis carried 4 generations of intergenerational trauma in the 1980s. My experience has shown me that the parents are now Klinghardt’s children. They are carrying those traumas and are unaware mostly. Children can detect it in their energy field so they become confused and untrusting when a parent “covers up” to safeguard the child, saying “everything is ok”. There may also be a case for these children being born to their parents to enable their parents healing. I would also suggest that this intergenerational trauma originates from many eons of war. Whilst many of our children do not have the experience of war per se. Those in their 60s and older at this time are fully aware of the effects of war and post war.
If children cannot trust their primary care giver the world is a very unsafe place.
If children experience adverse childhood events in such an early stage of development, before they are fully embodied, each sensory memory of the original event will trigger a trauma response. The child will live in fight or flight and may eventually freeze. At this point poor proprioception may ensue as the nervous system fails to communicate with the muscles. In this scenario many organs fails to function due to poor stability and structure of the body.
It is often said that empaths have no boundaries. I don’t feel it’s as easy as it may be portrayed to simply create boundaries. I believe also that nervous system dysregulation makes it immensely difficult to establish firm boundaries without the need to control our environment so this all needs a higher level of understanding.
Empaths and highly sensitives can and often do live in a constant state of anxiety impeding digestive function, hormone balance and neurotransmitter imbalance. This in turn leads to poor immunity. The scientific term for the study of this phenomena is psychoneuroimmunology. We are often diagnosed by naturopaths with Pyroluria. We do know that Pyroluria treatment can help enormously however it is not a cure. We also know that the specific nutrient deficiencies associated with Pyroluria also impact methylation negatively. Methylation is a crucial biochemical process that occurs in most cells of the body. It creates new cell membranes, hormones, neurotransmitters, cellular energy (ATP). It allows the assimilation, neutralization and detoxification of metabolic toxins, heavy metals and chemicals. Methylation also creates sulphate, without which the body cannot use vitamin D, red cells stick together like glue creating blood clots. They cannot carry oxygen, Iron or B12 for energy.
As a result we often succumb to a range of health challenges over time that have been associated with these deficiencies and also energetically associated with over giving, such as chronic fatigue, burnout and autistic burnout. The top 5 killer diseases – cardiovascular disease, dementia / poor mental health, auto-immunity, diabetes type 2 are also related to poor methylation. We may have gene polymorphisms that predispose us to these conditions, then the inflammation caused by the challenges of their environment trigger those genes to express. There is no wonder we can get so sick. This can however be corrected with the 5-Levels of healing approach to health challenges if a person really wants change.
Empath or Highly sensitive?
It seems pertinent to highlight the difference between the empath and the highly sensitive. The empath is known to absorb every energy in the room. They are unable to differentiate their energy from that of others so are frequently portrayed as having no boundaries. They are frequently exhausted. They are frequently enmeshed in the stories of others. I feel it goes much deeper than simply creating boundaries. Many of us have the earliest life trauma survival styles so we are unable to self regulate until we learn our own self truth, enabling us more flexibility for change.
Highly sensitive people (HSP’s) can be affected quite markedly by the emotions and energies of others. However HSPs do not take other’s energies on as their own. There seems to be a clearer differentiation between self and other for this group. Life can be a fair bit easier for highly sensitives, but not always. Both need to manage their energies in order to thrive.
We are often extremely gifted healers due to our kinesthetic gifts or our clair-senses. You will find us in all walks of life though very often in the caring professions. We make amazing teachers, nurses, therapists and carers. Many of us migrate to the alternative therapies as a therapist or to find our own self truth. We often have psychic ability. This can come in the form of:
clairvoyance (clear seeing)
May have vision of past and future. Are highly visual, preferring to be artists, builders, designers, photographers and decorators
clairaudience (clear hearing)
May hear words, sounds or music in the minds voice. May be best learning from the spoken word. Tend to migrate to carers as musicians, singers, writers and public speakers.
clairsentience (clear feeling)
In tune with the feelings of others as well as our own. Can feel the energy of others and their emotional or physical pain. May also be able to feel this from spirit. This makes the highly sensitive a natural healer so they may migrate to being a doctor, nurse, counsellor, alternative healer or nanny.
claircognisance (clear knowing)
These are people who simply “know” things without ever being taught. Truth simply comes into their heads at the appropriate time. They may experience premonitions. It takes a huge leap of faith with this clair because there is often no practical explanation for why we may suddenly know something. Children may have unbelievable skills at the age of 3 that were never taught. One of mine programmed electronic circuitry at this age. He is the first electronic engineer in my family.
Clairalience (clear smelling)
Being able to smell something without a physical source. An example might be a deceased relatives perfume. Certain smells may connect them to memories. They are likely to work as a florist, aromatherapist, wine taster or perfume fragrance creator.
Clairgustance (clear tasting)
The ability to taste something that isn’t actually there in physical form. This may occur when a deceased loved one is trying to make them see a memory association. A Heightened sense of taste would make an ideal baker, chef or food critic.
Staying sane in a mad world
How can we stay sane when the clair senses are opening up right now for many of us?
How can we say sane when we often have no-one to share our extraordinary experience of what life is teaching us?
How can we stay sane when all we see and hear in the media seems to be bad?
How do we stay integrated in society when we feel everything?
We can work with our energies to boundary ourselves from the onslaught of this sensory bombardment. We may need help to do this so we can feel whole and uncompromised.
We can learn to understand ourselves through specific modalities such as Enneagram personalities and the continuum of self model. We can learn where we are in terms of proprioception.
We can learn to protect ourselves spiritually and to cleanse our auras, chakras, our space of work, home, healing and interaction with the outside world. These are all necessary self care practices that help us to remain healthy and function well in the world.
We can find practitioners who can help us with different aspects of our own healing.
If this is you and you are unsure of what you need you can book an initial intuitive consultation and receive a really comprehensive 9 page report and recording. I will undertake a full analysis from your questionnaire and 90 minute zoom call looking at diet, lifestyle, body systems function, traumas, enneagram type, continuum of self type, the effects on your biochemistry. I will then help you to formulate a plan to heal on all 5 levels of healing which you can take at your own pace:
That 9 page report and recording will cover the following :
- Timeline (conception to current)
- Trauma types and survival styles
- Enneagram Personality types
- Continuum of self type
- Emotions (energy in motion) that block energy around organs
The specific effects of these on your biochemistry, specifically:
- Gut/Brain axis
- Digestion and gut microbiome
- Hormones and neurotransmitters
- Blood glucose regulation
A phased plan to help empower you to learn and heal to include:
- Links to further learning
- Nutrition and lifestyle recommendation
- Supplement recommendations
- Links to energy healers I have personally worked with
- Guidance / coaching through the process of learning to master your gifts.
Staying well with chronic compassion disorder
It goes without saying that many empaths and highly sensitives live with conditions such as chronic fatigue / Myalgic encephalitis. Other comorbidities often accompany this and in fact make the situation so complex it is like the proverbial chicken and egg scenario. This means that for the foreseeable future once you reach optimal health you need an ongoing programme to maintain the momentum and keep you well. This is when you become truly empowered to heal you. We can heal the mind, energetics, mindset and spirit. The body simply takes a little longer to repair itself. A golden rule of thumb assuming full compliance with your programme takes roughly 2 months for every year you have been sick. During this time you can be conservative with your appointments, only booking them when you are about to change from one phase to the next. Alternatively you can book in every month to ensure optimal coaching opportunities that develop your personal growth.
If you would like to ask your own questions on a 20 minute discovery call please book here: